Question:
how do i get it together?
hey all, I'm brand new here, but I'm just gonna jump right in.
I need advice. I've been playing off and on for about 12 years, but the majority of that time has been inconsistent, on my own, or with poor instruction (my first teacher played a flute, not a horn).
So as a result I understand the rudiments of music and have some basic skills, but my embochure needs work and I'm certain I have other bad habits that need to be addressed.
(and frankly I'm a bit embarrased about my playing level, b/c when I come across other musicians they naturally assume that a 31 year old horn player with more than a decade of playing behind him is actually much better than I am--so it's either pretend I'm something I'm not or try to explain how I started late and I'm still a beginner, neither of which is comfortable. but that's neither here nor there.)
But I'm at the point in my life where I need music now. It's the only pure joy I have. But I feel so stopped when I try to fully embrace it. Financially I just can't afford a teacher. As badly as I need one, keeping a roof over our head and a car in our driveway is challenging enough. My horn needs serious work. The neck is completely shot and I play on a plastic mouthpiece for lack of anything better. And my apartment living doesn't support me practicing, and I don't have a steady job to practice there either.
In the past I've felt I needed to stabilize our life and our finances first, and then music would be there. Then I could buy the things I needed, get a teacher, get moving forward. That hasn't worked. What's more, I can feel myself starting to crack for a lack of simple joy. (one that isn't tied to making more money, getting ahead, or anything like that.)
But I feel like things are stacked against me like dominoes. Say I scrounge up some money to buy a better mpc. The neck is still a piece of sh*t, the horn needs to be restored, even if I could talk a teacher into some kind of deferred payment where am I going to practice, etc, etc. Like a downward depressing spiral.
But I'm starting to feel like my mental health (and my ability to function as a healthy head of my household) hinges on me being able to get this together. I know I need some joy in my life to take some pressure off. But as I said I feel very confronted on how exactly to do that.
So if anyone has any insight about this, please, I am all ears. Actually I'm hoping this even makes sense. I didn't mean to write a novel my first time out.
happy playing all,
cedi

Answer:
if it's as warm where you live as it is here already, find a nice big open park or something and go and play there.
don't focus on what you've got to fix or learn, just focus for now on the joy of blowing into the horn. nothing beats long tones outside!
if you know your basic scales, practice those. full range of the horn, with good time. then work on improvising in those keys / scales. invent little melodies. be gentle with yourself, don't expect to be Charlie Parker right away, and be amazed by what you come up with.
figure out all the songs you know on your horn. Mary Had A Little Lamb, whatever Frank Sinatra - type tunes you might know etc. anything you can sing, you will be able to find on the horn with enough patience. fantastic ear training.
do you have a skill? perhaps you can find a teacher willing to do a skill - set swap. i've been on both sides of this sort of an arrangment and it's always worked out well.
start saving for a new mouthpiece I guess, but don't stress about that stuff. just play.

Answer:
Cedi, First off hang in there! A new MP isn't your answer. It would be the like putting perfume on a pig. It's still a pig. Sounds like first you need to fix your horn or replace it. You can't play well on a horn that doesn't play well. A few specifics may help like what is your horn (make & model). If you can't afford a teacher there some free online lessons. use our search function above. And last but not least, There is no substitute for practice! There are no magic bullets or super cure alls.
Good luck

Answer:
If I may, allow me to address your concerns in the order they were discussed in your posting.
First, feelings of embarrassment and being self-conscious about how one plays, is 100% normal. Stress and pressure affect everyone. One is born with a self-defense system called the "fight or flee stress" response. When one feels pressured, in order to mobilize energy and to speed up our reflexes, the brain will trigger the release of adrenaline. A second hormone, “cortisol”, soon follows, stimulating memory.
But, there’s a trade off. With all this activity going on, something is sacrificed. The same stress hormones that speed up our stress response mechanisms also can suppress those parts of the brain that allow us to maintain our concentration, handle distractions, and to think and perform effectively.
The result? We tense up. We take faster, shallower breaths, decreasing the amount of oxygen in our systems. This triggers the fight-flee syndrome, muscles tighten, and our minds become more emotional and anxious. We start talking to ourselves, worried that we'll make a mistake, wondering what other people are thinking about us, etc.
When things aren’t going as we hope, it’s critical to know what’s happening, why, and what to do about it. Becoming aware of how one’s nerves and emotions respond to pressure, is the first step toward learning how to manage them. When seen in this context, stress driven emotions like frustration, self-doubt, and embarrassment are not personal failings; they are personal passages. Here are some basic techniques that can help.
The next issue is "expectations", feeling that playing “well” is important to one’s hopes and well-being. I earlier talked about this in another post, but think that it’s appropriate to review it here.
What does “well” mean? How does one practically define it? Ken Forentran’s CD, Shadows and Short Stories, was selected by Downbeat as one of the best for 2005. An interview with Ken will be published shortly on SOTW. Here’s an excerpt. “I used to get all worked up” explains Ken. “I felt like I had to come up with the perfect song, the perfect set, and would get upset if there were mistakes. If you get stressed out, it’s going to affect the music.”
“ Worry turns you inward, cuts you off. We can begin to get nervous about it, to constantly worry. I used to have those kinds of anxiety issues. But, I learned to just let things happen. It’s not going to hurt you if you make mistakes. That’s how we learn…
We’re a lot better off going in relaxed and letting things happen. When you do this, the music will come to you. You can try something and it may not work, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t good music and people won’t like it…
You don’t have to sound like Coltrane or Brecker to be good. Players like Coltrane and Brecker are at a completely different level than other players, but that doesn’t mean that the other players are lesser players. Each of us has our own distinct voice and tone…Sound like yourself! Be yourself! You can learn licks and passages and eventually your own sound will emerge out of that.”
It’s also important to understand that every player, no matter how talented and experienced, is always learning. Stan Getz when he turned 50 said that he finally was beginning to understand how to play the sax. What we are looking for isn’t at the end of the voyage, it’s in our experiences along the say.
When one experiences pressure driven emotions like worry, anger, and regret, one mentally can become swept up in the past and the future, and lose sight of reality, the here and now. “Stop and smell the roses.” How often do we really do that? Life slips by while we are busy looking behind and ahead, entrapped by expectations and regret. When one misses the here and now, one misses the simple joys of reality: spring rain, a harvest moon, children’s laughter- all the everyday miracles one calls “life”. As a Chinese proverb describes: “A monk, traveling across the field, came upon a tiger. The tiger attacked and the monk fled, until he came to a steep cliff. The monk grabbed hold of an overhanging tree branch and swung down over the edge of the cliff. The tiger began to gnaw at the branch. Terrified, the monk looked down below, and saw another tiger waiting at the foot of the cliff. The branch began to weaken. The monk took a deep breath, and then noticed a strawberry plant nearby. Reaching out with one hand, the monk plucked a strawberry. How sweet it tasted!”
"Because yesterday has disappeared,
And tomorrow is difficult to know,
Think only of this day, this hour, this moment.
Forget about the strength or weakness of your power,
The good or bad of your nature.
Focus on one thing at a time in full concentration.
After that everything becomes
Truly easy."
Dogen Zenji
Sometimes things will flow easily, sometimes they won’t. Sometimes the results will be terrific, sometimes they won’t. That’s part of being a human being. The talent always is there. It just finds different ways to express itself from time to time. “Success” and “failure” are emotional value judgments. Success isn’t measured by result. Success is measured by one’s attitude to the result. Ultimately, success isn’t about winning or losing. Success is understanding and appreciating the privilege of simply being able to play. Many people would like to but didn’t have the discipline and determination you’ve had to stay with it, even when times are tough.
Not having a teacher can cause difficulties but isn’t insurmountable. When I first started playing, there weren’t any teachers available and even if there had been, in those days, no reputable teacher was going to teach the “devil’s music”- rock n’ roll. So I, like many other players with similar interests, had to sit down and listen to recordings over and over again to try and figure out what the sax players were doing. However, this wasn't "practice". This was something I loved to do, because I enjoyed the music and sound so much. That's how I wanted to sound, and that's the type of music I wanted to play.
And although I didn't have a teacher, I at least had the advantage of not trying to play or sound like Coltrane or Parker right from the start. I started on Lee Allen with Little Richard and solos from the early period of the 50's, because I loved what those players could do using only a few notes. Learning this style of music was the core motivation that kept me going. I soon worked out a regular practice routine with long tones, scales, etc. Once I had this base, it enabled me to later move on to other things.
Here's an excellent teaching web resource
Also, check out, if you haven't already, the many fine teaching resources of SOTW.
especially long tones.
It sounds like you’re interested in jazz, but if that interest runs to blues, r&b, and rock, a free, step-by-step, practical, teaching resource, prepared by talented pros, soon will be posted on SOTW.
Plus, you’ve come to the right place. This is a great Forum for asking questions, being directed to free resources, and just talking about playing. Here, you are never alone.
As for needed repairs to the sax, yes that would seem the obvious first step, but that’s assuming a good tech who charges a reasonable price is available. That may not always be the case. There is a Tech Directory on SOTW that may be of help. If the pads leak and/or the neck is badly dented, that could cause significant problems. Is it possible to break down what needs to be done first to get the horn in decent playing shape, and then take things a step at a time? Would repairs to the neck get it back in decent playing shape? Unless the neck is badly dented, a good tech may be able to repair the neck and check for leaks without running up a large bill. Will they take payments over a period of time? As for the mpc, in the past if it has worked for you and the type of music you want to play, it may not be critical at this stage. Lee Allen, whose solos in the 50’s with Little Richard are often regarded as the seminal style for this period, was reputed to have used whatever stock mpc came with the sax.
Finally, as you can see, you needn’t have worried about “writing a novel”, I’m clearly the guilty party!

Answer:
Give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
Best of luck, man! Keep us posted!

Answer:
Originally Posted by altoblues do you have a skill? perhaps you can find a teacher willing to do a skill - set swap. i've been on both sides of this sort of an arrangment and it's always worked out well. That's what my wife does, barter with the skills you have vice the dollars or euros. I'm actually impressed because she does this even though we could pay for the lessons.

Answer:
thank you all for responding. I can't say enough how much I appreciate your words of encouragement and insight. I'm definitely taking on just going out and playing, before all else, b/c I think tbone and altoblue are right on when they say there's no substitute for just playing.
neil, i want to particularly thank you for your post, not just for your help with playing, but for how it applies to life. I feel like I need to be with it a bit longer because for me there is a much wider application to understanding and managing stress, and I thank you for that.
and thanks to you to g-dawg for reminding me of the serenity prayer. serenity is not something I've put much energy towards lately, and maybe that's something that should change.
I don't know what skill I could trade, but it's a great idea. and one worth looking into.
I feel the horn itself is probably serviceable, though not nearly what it could be. It's a badly treated six-digit mark vi that i found for next to nothing in a band music store, so it has student pads and needs some serious tlc even though it's playable. the neck is badly dented and patched and well as grimy as all get out on the inside, so I susptect it needs to be replaced. Again, playable, but not nearly the horn it could be with some work.
i'll check back with periodic updates. thank you all again.

Answer:
Hey Axeman,
We all get overcome at times with the mountain of obstacles we need to overcome to accomplish our goals. My suggestion to you is to focus on what it is that you can do today to make progress torward the goal.
Start by creating a list of things you need to do to play music the way you want, then prioritize them the best you can. Then set a short term goal to accomplish the first thing on the list. If your horn is unplayable without repair, then start by working torward getting it fixed. Decide what amount of time you can give to the task today, and use it to work torward your short term goal. Don't worry about tomorrow, simply concentrate on today. This will reduce the stress of focusing on the intimidating overall goal, and give you a sense of satisfaction as you accomplish each daily goal. Over time, as you check off items on your priority list you will begin to gain confidence in your ability to achieve the long term result.
Remember what my man Confucious said:
"a journey of 1,000 miles begins with the first step."
Good Luck and keep pluggin'
Jon

Answer:
1. Sell the VI on ebay and buy yourself something new and nice. Even after a major overhaul, it may not play as well as a new horn. You could sell the VI buy yourself a nicer, newer, better sax and still have some money to share with your family.
2. Learn something (anything) in 12 keys. Even if it's just a 3 note lick like "Georgia, Georgia..."
3. Listen to, and copy the players you like -- emulate their sound and inflection.
4. Stay the course!

Answer:
The interview, "Jazz and The Touch of Zen", with Ken Fornetran, whose CD was selected by Downbeat as one of the best in 2005, is now available.
Ken has some very interesting comments about attitudes and values that can be of practical benefit for every player.